Fucking words

I’ve been musing a little about how we talk about sex.

Image-by-Tom-Lindsay

Consider the difference between “I fucked him” and “We fucked”. The former uses the verb “fuck” transitively, making the other person into someone that you’re doing something to, whereas the later uses “fuck” intransitively, treating the other person as a co-collaborator.

This feels like a relevant linguistic distinction given recently news stories about rape and consent. One of these phrasings implies consent and the other doesn’t necessarily.

Interestingly, in thinking up examples, I found it kind of hard to rephrase certain sentences collaboratively, especially sentences expressing a desire. For instance, how might you rephrase “I’d like to bone her” collaboratively? “I’d like for us to bone” sounds kind of awkward. I personally like “I’d like to bone with her”, though no one uses the verb “bone” that way. Except me, from now on.

Of course, I don’t mean to suggest that using a transitive verb is the same as not caring about the other persons consent. And some people probably don’t mind being objectified from time to time. But I do think that the way we talk about sex influences the way we think about sex, and, all other things being equal, the transitive phrasing tends to downplay the collaborative nature of the activity.

So next time I see someone super attractive, I’ll definitely be expressing my willingness for us to tap each other.

Advertisements

About marcpevans

I'm a composer, and a graduate student at UC Santa Barbara. This blog contains my philosophical musings on music and on other things. If you want to actually listen to my music, you can find it at www.marcevansmusic.com. Welcome! :)
This entry was posted in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s